I will be the water
for your thirst
Washed, hair oiled and bound,
with new clothes on his back, Fan Li is brought before Fu Chai in the latter's
study. He prostrates himself in proper fashion, rises when bidden, and accepts
the gracious offer to seat himself before the king's table. There's a small
silence as he and the king look each other over. Fu Chai is young, no more than
Fan Li's own age perhaps, but his regard is heavier and more weighted than Fan
Li would have expected.
"So you're the man whose
tactics defeated us at Zui Li," the king says at last.
"No, your Majesty. What
defeated you at Zui Li was the zeal of the men of Yue, that took your
soldiers by surprise. Your servant can claim no credit for that."
"And what caused the men of Yue to show such
zeal?"
"Desperation, your Majesty. A great army came to crush
their nation. There was nothing to hope for from survival, so they determined
to make Wu pay as much as possible for their deaths. There'd be at least one or
two fewer men of Wu to occupy their country-- or three, or four, and so you had
the slaughter and rout that followed."
"And the moral of that
is-- what?"
"Your Majesty already
knows. Never make your enemies despair. Desperate men have nothing to lose.
Now, should Wu make war on the north, on Xi or Song for instance, those
nation's determination will be undermined by your Majesty's merciful treatment
of the king of Yue. That was a brilliant stroke, as any tactician must
agree."
"Mh. My chancellor
doesn't think so. He thinks I've doomed my country by leaving Gou Jian
alive."
Fan Li takes a deep breath.
"Wu Zi Xu sees Yue as a constant threat to Wu because of something he
thinks it might do in future. Yue sees Wu as a constant threat because of
something it did in the past- the constant demands for territory, the taking of
its cities. The king of Yue was strongly inclined to a policy of peace, but men
of your father's generation argued that Wu Zi Xu would never allow your Majesty
to agree-- that nothing would satisfy him but the complete destruction of Yue's
royal line, as nothing satisfied him but the destruction of Chu's capital.
Those arguments prevailed, and can one wonder?"
"We are king in Wu, not
Wu Zi Xu."
"That's why my king is
still alive. But Wu Zi Xu has prestige among the nations and popularity with
the people. They associate him with Wu's rise to prominence. He is someone in
their regard, and your Majesty cannot ignore his counsels."
"You're a sensible man,
Master Fan. So what should my Majesty do?"
"Increase Wu's prestige
by your own efforts, so that people will say 'Helu and his counsellor brought
us up from nothing, but it was Fu Chai who became hegemon of the nations."
The king strikes the table in
pleasure, and smiles broadly. "We like your ideas. And are you willing to
help us do that?"
Fan Li bows. "That is
why your servant is here."
"You will not find us
ungenerous in return."
"My humble thanks to
your Majesty. But I wonder if your Majesty is generous enough to grant Fan Li's
first request?"
"Mh. Say what it
is."
"Give me leave to speak
with the king of Yue."
There's a sudden chill on the
air. That was expected, but the king's evident discomfiture is a surprise. Fu
Chai looks away as he says, "You miss Gou Jian, I suppose?"
Fan Li's eyebrows rise.
"The generals and courtiers have had no news of him for many months. We're
worried, naturally, as to how the king and queen bear their servitude. Your
Majesty was merciful to them, but so great a change from their previous state
must have an effect."
Fu Chai gives an amused
snort. "None that we've noticed. Very well. You may visit Gou Jian.
Briefly." He pauses, looking Fan Li over; clearly there's something more
that he can't find the words for. At last he waves a dismissive hand without saying
anything more. Fan Li bows and walks backwards the proper three steps out of
the king's presence.
A servant waits to conduct
him through the palace grounds. Fan Li follows, heart uneasy. He can divine
what that was about. Bo Pi has been gossiping, telling Fu Chai all he knows or
suspects, and the king is plagued by curiosity and a jealousy he doubtless
isn't aware of. He wants to know what's between the King and me. He'll be
pressing me for details soon. And thinks, in sadness, how could I begin
to explain? Even I haven't the words to say what it is...
...the conference went on and
on. Ku Cheng lit the lamps and still the three of them sat over the table
spread with maps and reports of their spies in Wu, reports from the border as
to the present position of Wu's army, and Wen Zhong's own dispiriting
assessment of Yue's manpower. Wen Zhong stifled a yawn and the king looked up,
dark-eyed himself.
"It's late. Go to bed,
counsellor. Maybe this will look different with some sleep."
"I thank your
Majesty." Wen Zhong bowed and waited for Fan Li to make his own adieux.
"Have good rest,
counsellor," he said. "I'll see you in the morning." Wen Zhong
took the hint and retired. Gou Jian turned weary eyes on Fan Li.
"What is it you want to
say to us out of Wen Zhong's hearing?"
"That Yue's situation is
desperate, but in my opinion, not desperate enough. The old advisors think that
all we need to do is make more concessions and Wu will withdraw-- just for the
moment, just long enough to let us recoup our strength. It won't happen--"
"Of course it won't
happen. Helu's no fool and neither is Prince Lei. They know we're weak and so
they'll press us the more."
"Therefore we need to
confront them now, to demonstrate to the troops just how bad things have
become. We can't give them the morale of a victory but we can give them a
defeat-- a defeat that makes them determined to fight ferociously before they
die. And *that* may prove strong enough to overcome the odds."
Gou Jian was silent.
"It's too risky. A defeat will discourage the men completely."
"I think we should take
that risk. A man who thinks he has the possibility of safety will be chary of
his own life. A man who knows he's going to die has nothing to lose. We need
men who will go into battle knowing they won't come out. That's what
will give us the edge we need."
Gou Jian rubbed at his eyes.
"Possible, yes, possible. We will think this over. Because you're
right--" he looked up suddenly- "Yue's very existence is at stake
here. Yue could end as the result of a single battle, and it must not."
The sudden ferocity was like
the roar of a forest fire. Without thinking Fan Li leaned forward, as if to
warm himself at a real blaze. "No, your Majesty, it must not. And it will
not. Fan Li guarantees it." Their faces were only inches apart. Gou Jian's
eyes-- those elegant sardonic eyes-- looked straight into Fan Li's, and there
was no coolness or distance there now. The king's purpose was writ plain: black
as the night sky, incandescent as a comet, unresistible as a wall of flood
water. Fan Li was shaken to his core. Too much-- he thought confusedly--
too much for one man.
He felt himself falling into
darkness, pulled down by the huge weight of the king's will. His mind yelled
his danger. He'd always been careful of himself-- light in his attachments,
ready to leave off before any fancy became serious enough to hurt him. And here
he was, tumbling into the heart of the fire, about to be burned alive. ...nothing
left of me!! his spirit screamed, but even as his heart juddered in terror
and his hands went to ice, a Fan Li he'd never known existed sang in
exultation. Free, free-- no more cangue around my neck, no more chains on my
feet---
What happened next was beyond
his power to describe or even to remember. He never knew who reached out first
to catch hold of the other or who first turned his head to find the other's
mouth. The two of them fell sideways together to the cold wooden floor. The
king's weight and heat filled his arms and pressed against his body as his body
pressed against the king's-- grappling and thrashing, trying to find some
release, trying to find where the other was beneath the layers of cloth-- Robes
hiking up, hands at least finding a heat they could grab and stroke, face
buried in a wilderness of black hair that slid beneath him like silk and into
thicknesses of silk that slipped under his hands like hair, losing himself and
lost except for the grip of fingers on his arms that left bruises there for
days. The king's mark on his flesh-- the only proof he had that this impossible
thing had happened.
Not that that was the last
time, though afterwards was more decorous, the two of them stripped to
nightclothes and underclothes within the hangings of the king's bed. But it was
an event that lacked words: starting with an unvoiced invitation, consummated
in near silence, and never spoken of afterwards. What the nighttime Gou Jian
did with the nighttime Fan Li was kept scrupulously apart from the daytime king
and his counsellor. Ku Cheng, who disrobed the king before and helped Fan Li
robe himself after, showed no change of manner and expression when he ushered
Fan Li into the king's apartments during the day. 'So this is the way of it,'
Fan Li concluded, and put the matter from his mind. That was the way of it. He
belonged to the king of Yue in a way he'd never expected, but it was, still,
only the nighttime Fan Li: a silent unthinking someone, more a desire than a
man, who was quite separate from the king's eloquent clever strategist of the
day time hours.
But that Fan Li was in
difficulties too. As the days went by, and especially after their first victory, Fan Li
started to feel himself growing somehow stretched thin and pale. He was no
longer what he'd been, Fan Li of Chu, a wandering advisor. He was chief
counsellor to the king of Yue and the king's closest confidante, his fate now
bound inextricably to that of Gou Jian. And Gou Jian was going places where Fan
Li had no wish to follow. The war on Wu-- it was madness to plot war against Wu
now. The old king dead, the new king raw in power, and Wu Zi Xu running the
country as he wished. Now was the time to lie low and hoard one's strength, to
give Wu not the slightest pretext for moving against Yue; but Gou Jian was set
on war.
Fan Li wrote a memorial to dissuade him from that path. When
he came to present it, he meant also to ask permission to be absent for some
days. The king would have no relish for his ideas: let Gou Jian digest them in
peace while Fan Li dealt with his mother's desperate situation in Chu. But
before he could do either the king said the words that ended everything.
'You're my advisor, but still, I want there to be no distance between us.' The
nighttime Gou Jian had suddenly presented his face in the light. Fan Li's soul
trembled. The king had broached their silent agreement; the king wanted all of
him, and Fan Li would never be his own man again. The brief parting he'd
envisaged became, in that instant, permanent.
His heart mourned as he left Yue but his soul knew there was
no choice. How naïve he'd been, not calculating the forces ranged against him.
His mouth twisted. Fan Li, a strategist? No one would believe it. He'd taken
account only of Gou Jian and so thought himself safe. The king would let him go
and never speak his name again; Gou Jian was deeply hurt by Fan Li's double
betrayal and dangerously angry, but Gou Jian's pride would never stoop to
calling his favourite back unwilling. The queen however felt nothing of that:
the queen was that part of Gou Jian that acted calmly when the king's anger and
pride held him paralyzed. It was Fan Li's turn to feel betrayed when he
realized who it was had barred his mother's door to him. Ya Yu was the only
person positioned as he himself was; obscurely he felt she ought to understand
his position and have pity for him. But of course it was easier for a woman,
natural even, for her to become one with the man she was married to. Fan Li
returned to take up the burden of being the King's man, and never knew if he
was sad or glad of it. But some part of him wept still in silence. Will I
never be my own again? Will there never be someone who belongs to *me*?...
...The servant brings him to a small stone cottage beside
the stables. The smell of horses and dung is strong, but in the thin soil by
the door a flowering bush sends a thread of fragrance under the warm stink. The
servant calls to the house.
"King of Yue! His Majesty gives leave for Fan Li to wait
upon you."
It's Ya Yu who comes to the door, smiling in delight.
"Master Fan! Your Majesty, Fan Li is here!"
The king comes out much more slowly from the darkness of the
house. He's clad in his homespun robe, hair tied back with a black length of
cloth. Fan Li sees in relief that he looks rested and well, and no thinner than
during the last campaign at least. He bows, hands together, painfully aware of
his own new clothes and polished appearance.
"Your Majesty, Fan Li presents himself." The
servant stands still at his back. They're slaves themselves here in Wu; no
dismissing the man.
Gou Jian nods at him,
distant.
"Fu Chai treats you
well, counsellor."
"The prime minister has
recommended me to the king of Wu's attention." Gou Jian waits for him to
continue. "Fan Li will attempt to advise the king in what small ways he
may."
"Good. Do that, by all
means. Serve the king of Wu better than you did the king of Yue."
Fan Li bows, a man justly
rebuked. "I will do as my sovereign says."
Gou Jian snorts and turns
away, walking a little to the side. "How do our generals bear their
imprisonment?"
"They are well treated
by the king of Wu, and they endure the tedium and the minor inconveniences of
their state for love of their king, as do we all."
Gou Jian nods, as if not much
interested.
"Your Majesty is a great
king," Fan Li says, with all the warmth and sincerity at his command.
"He has the ability to draw men's love and devotion, sometimes indeed in
spite of themselves. Your former enemies- older men, experienced warriors and
statesmen like Shi Mai and Ye Yong, yielded in the end to the draw of your
power. How could a young man inexperienced in the ways of the world
resist?"
Gou Jian's eyes shift back to
Fan Li.
"But your Majesty should
perhaps have a care how he exercises that power. He is not king in Wu as he is
in Yue, and the consequences here are likely to be much different than at
home."
Gou Jian searches Fan Li's
face. Suddenly he laughs, smiling in true amusement. But his voice is a whip.
"Counsellor, you are
drunk, already at this hour. Lay off the wine, Fan Li- it was always your weak
point and it makes you see phantoms."
"Fan Li is a diviner of
mediocre talents. But the phantoms he sees have often proved true." He
bows, hands together. "Your servant will take his leave. Let the Great
Lord have a care to his health and his body."
"We thank you for your
wishes. Good day. I think we will not see you again." Gou Jian turns and
walks away. Fan Li sighs, bows a last time, and returns to the company of the
servant.
Gou Jian walks into his
cottage and sits himself down on the bed. Ya Yu comes to stand at his side.
Through the window they watch Fan Li and the guard disappear around a corner of
the stable.
Gou Jian eyebrows crease in
thought. "Is it possible? How can it be possible? He must be seeing
things."
"Fan Li usually sees
facts," Ya Yu says. "Why would he imagine an attachment that isn't
there?"
"Jealousy," the
king says. "But I wouldn't have thought that of him either."
"If Fan Li were jealous,
it would never be for no reason."
Gou Jian nearly groans. His
face grows dark. "And this afternoon we must play chess again with the
King. This game is looking to be very interesting."
mjj
Feb 09